The current baby market

One of the questions we receive here most at DearFranz is this one: From where should I adopt a baby? From what country? Where's the newest place? That question has always been popular, so that's why, last year, I developed a top ten list!

The newest on the list is Ireland. An Irish baby shows an awareness of the country's tanking economy and it's noticeable absence of once thriving charities, such as the Magdalene Laundries. The only obvious problem is that the baby's new owner constantly has to tell people about the adoption, since it may not be obvious (e.g. caucasian parent, caucasian baby). And new parents with darker skin may easily be accused of white slavery. Not good!

Donatella Versace and I spent nearly an hour on this list, so I really do hope that it helps. Actually it was longer than that: we were sitting by the pool and had just finished this list when this huge gust of wind blew that list away....right out into the Italian Riviera. I know she'd kill me for saying this, but you should've seen her chasing that sheet of paper...topless. We laughed so hard we almost died. (Even though we had to write down all ten countries all over again!)

Anyway, here it goes:

10. Ireland

9. India (Slumdog Millionaire is still having an impact)

8. Rwanda. What can you say? It has to be somewhere on this list.

7. Vietnam. Many of us who grew up in the seventies and eighties are probably nostalgic for our childhood playmates we got after the fall of Saigon.

6. Cambodia. Angelina Jolie would cut us dead if we didn't give this nation a "shout out"!

5. China. It seems rather mundane. So many people have them. But they just continue to be popular and really say, "adoption!".

4. Turks and Caicos. People really enjoy traveling back and forth there during the adoption process.

3. Ethiopia. A perennial favorite, probably since Hands Across America.

2. Malawi. Last year this was our number one. But two years in row just wouldn't be believable and I think other countries need a chance to "shine".

1. Congo. It's absolutely the most dangerous place right now, so no.1 is only natural, right?

Remember, this list could change immediately if there were to be some natural disaster, like a tsunami or an earthquake in some remote part of the world. Just hope nothing like that happens in the middle of the adoption process! That happened to a woman I know (remotely) and she was really upset about it at first, but then the adoption country became popular again, so everything turned out ok.

Best of luck to you all!

Let's give a round of applause!

I just wanted to say how proud I am of my friend Anna Wintour - she did such a good job on Letterman last night! She was so nervous, and really wasn't in the mood - but I think she did just fine. She seemed engaged, which I know she was not, and that was so kind! I hope everyone goes to see her movie. I forget what it's called.

But I can think of many parties this year where she was sorely missed: All due to the fact that she was working at her magazine. She works for a good cause and does so for very little money (or so I'm told). God Bless you Anna! Everyone send her flowers or money or something and go see that movie she's in. I don't think she actually acts in it. She was telling me all about it, and she seemed so very excited, but there was something going on in the background, so I was distracted. Or I was on a date or something.... Anyway, keep up the good work!

A little late for Bikini Season

This is a little late for the bikini season in America, but these are things I picked up from some friends in Sardinia!

Dear Franz,

I liked your advice about losing weight: Never eat unless you're with someone else. Do you have any thing else?

Dear Reader,

That really should work for everyone. Never eat unless you're with someone. For those of you who don't know, it's really just so everyone can say, "I don't know how they stay so slender, I always see them eating!"... But take it easy. Like everything else - use moderation. Only eat when you're with other, and in moderation. Maybe I forgot to say that.

But one of the best things I picked up this summer from some friends, and I won't say who - they'd kill me! One of the best things to do is to fool your metabolism by eating one almond an hour! I don't know why I never thought of that myself. So if you stay awake for say, 9 hours a day, always take with you 9 almonds! And reader - one almond an hour and nothing else! Save those calories for going out to dinner or a party. And remember moderation!

Here's a lesson for everyone regarding moderation. And I have no problem using her name, as we are not speaking this month. It was soprano Dawn Upshaw (sorry, Dawn!) and apparently she was using the almond trick, or at least trying. We were at a party that evening at 21 and she made a spectacle of herself, by gorging just about everything in sight. It was revolting! Apparently she ate so much that she vomited in the ladies room (Uninduced, mind you and I heard Renee Flemming had to hold her hair back, I don't know if that's true). So you can imagine what everyone was calling her: Upchuck. ... Writing this I almost feel sorry for her. But not really. She knows where to find me if she wants to apologize....

But not to get too far off the subject. The other weight loss trick I heard this summer is this - and it's a variation on an oldie but goodie: Wrap yourself in plastic, underneath your work out clothes, and walk on the treadmill at varying speeds for lengthy amount of time. Four hours is recommended, but if you can't do that, just find your own exercise trick. I don't know what else to tell you.

Except this: Another source told me that a bottle of magnesium citrate first thing in the morning the day after a party cancels out all the effects of the night before. This must be followed by a two day fast. Drink vegetable broth only to maintain strength.

Best of luck to all you snowbirds out there - See you in Rio!