READER QUESTION: THE THIN HAVE FEELINGS TOO!

Dear Franz,

After just having a stressful lunch with some friends, I’d like to shout out that thin people don’t like to be mocked any more than overweight people do.

I’m 38 and weigh the same as when I was 18. Let me tell you, I’m not bragging. After 20 years and two kids, nothing looks like it used to or is even in the same place it used to be. I don’t have a spectacular figure, just a thin one.

But I’m tired of being accused of calorie-counting, starving myself or exercising constantly. I’m tired of the snickers with sidelong glances from people about how they “enjoy their food” and would “rather be happy than thin.” Truth be told, I just don’t have a strong relationship with food. I eat when I’m hungry, stop when I’m full, and I’ve never had a big appetite.

I’m tired of feeling like I can never defend myself for fear of insulting someone. I usually just keep my mouth shut or change the subject.

Just like anyone else, I don’t want to be mocked or stereotyped. Can you please remind your readers that it’s not nice to make comments about someone’s weight, regardless of what their weight is?


Dear Reader,

If I could say just one thing, it's this: grow up!

This is the kind of nagging and kidding the whole world dreams about. Why fight it?

You're not being mocked or stereotyped at all: you're being envied. The only thing you should be worried about - or the only thing that should bother you is that this "criticism" hasn't gone far enough. The ultimate goal, or the ultimate indirect compliment is when your friends start to "worry" about you - when they start telling you that you're "too" thin. That's when you know that they're really jealous! This is your friends' way of telling you, "Come back. Please. Be like me. I'm feeling insecure standing next to you. I'm frightened."

And I can understand where your friends are coming from as well. I can imagine that if I was out to lunch with you, and I wanted to eat a giant cheese platter for dessert, and you just sat there - I would probably be jealous too. Who wouldn't say that they would rather "eat and be happy than be thin?" But people don't really mean that when they say it. It's more like a form of self hypnosis so that they can enjoy dessert. You know what I mean?

So instead of getting yourself all worked up, sit back and sympathize with their insecurities. Just try not to smirk. People HATE that.


And don't forget that there are even more diet tips in my book, Dear Franz: Advice for Everyman from the Duke of Merzenburg!