Dear Franz,
We have been lucky to have the same wonderful, caring nanny since our 2-year-old was 3 months old. She lives with us, so often she is around even when off-duty.
It has been great in many ways because my husband’s and my leaving for work causes our son no stress, and he is in great hands.
At times, though, he wants to play with the nanny rather than us, or asks for her when she’s not around. A part of me says this is good — I have so many friends whose kids cry when they leave — but the other part worries he doesn’t understand who the parents are. Is this something to be concerned about?
No. This is nothing to be concerned about.
Isn't that a good thing that your child asks for the nanny and not you? Would you like the alternative? Hearing that child scream your name all the time and having him ask you to do certain things?
That doesn't seem like fun to me!
Your child will know who his parents are. Trust me. At this point, it's just playtime and wanting this and that. Cookies, I imagine. And ice cream - I remember I was always asking my governess for ice cream.... And foie gras - could never get enough!
But there will come a time when the nanny won't be able to help him. The nanny won't be able to pay for his vacations, or school or first house or car or boat. She won't be able to fill the boat's gas tank! And that's where you come in - and that's when your child will know who's really in charge.
Besides that - isn't there boarding school in the near future?
In any case, consider your situation a blessing. Go on vacations and travel the world! You don't have to worry about the child missing you since he won't!
Make sure to buy the eBook, available on Amazon: Dear Franz, Advice for Everyman from the Duke of Merzenburg! UPDATE: It's soon to be available on iTunes, Sony and Barnes & Noble... I'm not sure what all this means, but if it has meaning to you - make sure to buy it!
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